RYANGLANZER.COM INTERVIEW: JORDAN KROGMAN, 12/21/04
I recently had the chance to sit down with my 20-year old sister, Jordan Krogman. Jordan is of course in her second year of college at USD, where she and her husband Calvin are raising their 1-year old daughter Peyton.
In this interview, "J" means Jordan, "A" means Alex, "R" means Ryan, and "C" means Calvin.
What do you miss most about being pregnant?
J: Being able to sleep solidly for one night.
If Peyton started speaking in German, what would your reaction be?
J: I would wonder why she spoke German instead of Spanish seeing how she's never heard it before.
Which two of your USD friends would you most like to set up on a double date with me and Jason LaPlant?
J: Abria Varney, Alese's best friend. I wouldn't say Lindsay because she doesn't deserve such punishment.
R: I didn't think you had any friends.
J: I would say Amy from Psychology. She and Jason would get along well I think.
C: Who is that?
J: The one who sits by me in Psych.
On an average day, how many times do you urinate?
J: Probably only about 3 or 4. Sometimes only twice.
A: No wonder you have a bladder infection.
J: I suppose that will be a side comment.
R: Of course.
What was the best movie you saw in 2004?
J: I saw very few. But my favorite was The Bourne Supremacy I think. Either that or Shrek 2. That was okay.
What are your feelings on Brandon Hanson becoming a masseuse?
J: I don't have any thoughts on it, but I have thoughts on him dropping out of school after four years.
What is one thing Calvin could get you for Christmas that you'd be so thrilled about that you'd slap him out of sheer excitement?
J: A multi-karat diamond ring. Righthand ring.
What state would you most want to annex from the union? Why?
J: Texas because they think they think they're so great, in their own little state anyway. They should be ousted.
If you were stranded on a desert island 16 feet in diameter with one of Calvin's family members, an 80's sitcom star, someone whose name starts with the letter W, and one of my VF friends you've never met, who would they be, and what one beverage would you bring along for everyone?
J: I would pick Rebecca Evans, Rudy from the Cosby Show cause she'd be the same age I am. Oh, no, change that to Stephanie Tanner. Wayne Evans, Calvin's grandpa. Kayla Laursen I suppose, she seems alright. I'd say we'd need some sort of liquor. I'm gonna go with Bacardi Raz.
What song annoys you the most?
J: Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy. I have to listen to that song a lot.
If you could slap anyone in the face really hard, who would it be?
J: (very long hesitation) Umm, why don't you go with this woman who outbid me on a large lot of books on eBay when I first bid on them. I was a sophomore in high school. I could have slapped her so hard.
A: What about Shawn LaMont for burning books?
J: No.
If you could change Calvin's name to the name of a foreign country, what would it be?
J: Jordan.
What was the worst smell you can recall?
J: Calvin's fart the day we left to come here for Christmas break, before we left, and I unknowingly walked through the cloud of rectum excretions.
Which former Willow Lake classmate would be the funniest to see host the Tony Awards?
J: Jessica Koppman. It would be funny to see Keith do it too.
Where would you go on spring break this year if Alex was paying for it all by doing fundraisers like bake sales?
J: I would go to Cancun, Mexico.
A: If I'm doing it based on my bake sales fundraisers, you'd make it to DeSmet.
How were your grades this semester?
J: Less than what I had in mind. I'm still waiting to hear from my Intro to Criminal Justice class, but so far I have one A and three B's.
What are your plans for next semester?
J: I'm taking Spanish 201, Bio 103, Psychology of Personal Adjustment, Understanding the Sexes, and Speech.
J: Ask me what I got you for Christmas.
R: What did you get me for Christmas?
J: I didn't get you anything, however, you will receive something from us. I didn't purchase anything.
R: Hmmm.
J: And no, it's not another picture that Peyton drew, which has been the staple gift for everyone for a year now.
If you were late for a test and you knew the only thing you could do was run to class wearing nothing but three handkerchiefs taped onto your body, would you take the F or go to class with the handkerchiefs?
J: I would take the F, it's a long test this time of year.
If I agreed to cook you a fancy dinner for two in our filthy kitchen in Madison, would you accept my offer?
J: Yes, I probably would. You stink. You must have bad stinky gas. Stinky poo girl, standing on my pelvic girdle. Whee! Want down? Let's let her down. There you go! You're delivered safely to the floor. (Jordan stopped to talk to Peyton.)