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 1.
Hello Lauren, how are you today?
I'm doing well, Ryan! Thank you for asking. I'm a bit tired and I
still have the remnants of a cold, but overall, I feel better today than
I have in about two weeks!
2. It certainly is an honor to have you join us today here on
ryanglanzer.com. What do you know about this website and what is your
opinion of it?
Please, the honor is all mine! I don’t know a great deal about the
website, as it were, as I’ve only known of it for about two months. I
have devoted some time to reading some of the more recent daily logs,
interviews and looking at photos. It’s an impressive body of work! I
doubt that I would personally be comfortable with having so much of my
life exposed to the world, but you obviously enjoy it. The only
drawback, I would say, is that it takes some of the mystery out of
dating you—sometimes when we’re talking, I half-expect you to refer me
to your website for some of your personal history!
3. Tell us a little about your living arrangements. Where do you live
and who with?
I live just a bit south of the Walker Art Museum in Minneapolis, in
a triplex with two other girls and many, many animals. Both Denise and
Sarah have dogs, plus Denise has a cat, and I have a fish.
4. You are clearly an animal person. What pets do you have and/or want?
I currently have a fish named after Texas Rangers C/1B Jarrod
Saltalamacchia. I’m a sucker for all dogs, but I don’t have one of my
own at this time. I’d love one but I know I’m not ready for the
financial burden or the responsibility. When I “grow up” I plan on
having at least one dog. I’ve always had Labradors of some kind, but I
like Yorkies as well. I imagine the breeds of dog I’ll eventually own
will depend on my lifestyle and living arrangements at the time.
5. Where do you work, and what on earth do you do?
I work for a small telecommunications consulting firm in St Louis
Park, MN. I’m responsible for a variety of tasks, but my main focus is
billing analysis for a handful of our clients.
6. Why do you describe yourself as a generally optimistic, happy person?
For starters, I don’t think that it’s just a description! My good
humor and relatively overall happiness are the result of a conscious
choice I make each day to be happy and to make the best of what life has
given me. I didn’t always take such joy out of daily life—a major
turning point happened about a year and a half ago when I decided to
stop caring about what other people thought of me. Life got a lot better
when I decided to stop trying to be cool and allowed myself to be goofy!
7. What were your thoughts on the 2007 Twins?
Disappointing on almost every level. From Bradke’s retirement to the
M&M boys being injured and losing their power to that awful Castillo
trade to the mere existence of Juan Rincon, 2007 was a rough year for my
Twinkies.
There were some bright spots, of course. Scott Baker’s near perfect
game, which I was lucky enough to attend, Santana’s 17 KOs, and at long
last, the Twins organization seems to agree with me that Rincon is a pox
on the team.
8. What are your thoughts on the upcoming 2008 Twins?
I’m hopeful! Liriano’s rehab appears to be on track; we’ll know soon
enough if he has the same stuff that he had in 2006. I don’t know a
great deal about some of the recent acquisitions, but expect things at
Yeah, Buddy! to pick up soon enough—if
I can tear myself away from a certain Mr Glanzer long enough to write a
few posts!
9. From the female fan's perspective, who are the best and worst looking
Twins players?
Obviously, Mauer and Morneau are fan favorites. I think Scott Baker
is absolutely yummy and Nick Blackburn has some serious potential. I’m
quite proud that Yeah, Buddy is making a name for itself as the blog
that knows serious baseball but loves the ephemera, the silly aspects of
the sport. I love the silliness.
10. Clearly my grammar skills won you over, and vice versa. How did you
develop such sharp writing skills?
My parents were both educated to be journalists, so the writing gene
is natural to the Poulter clan. My father is one hell of an editor and
used to give me writing assignments during summer breaks; I knew how to
outline a research paper before I was in the third grade!
11. How did you decide to go to college in Canada?
To be different! My step-mother is Canadian and I’d visited Toronto
before. I liked the city and didn’t want to be another EPHS grad that
went to Iowa State.
12. What brought you back to live in Minnesota after college?
Customs and Immigration Canada denied an extension of my student
visa and forced me to leave the country before I’d even finished my
degree. Bastards!
13. Are you excited for your 24th birthday coming up in less than a
month?
I suppose! I’m not sure that I want to make a big deal of it. Maybe
I’ll just make you take me out to a ridiculously expensive meal and then
get me drunk. What do you think?
In all seriousness, I get weird about my birthday. 24 is right before 25
which is a quarter-century and then I get to thinking, shouldn’t I have
accomplished something by now? I mean, Jane Austen wrote Pride and
Prejudice when she was 21 years old!
14. How flattered are you that my friends think so highly of you?
Quite flattered, really! Although it’d be nice if they could tell me
so when we haven’t all been drinking for a few hours. Jason’s still not
sure that I understand that I’m his best friend’s girlfriend. But I
really do understand it.
15. With my apartment lease ending at the end of February, where would
you recommend I move?
Minneapolis, of course! You know, the swanky apartment across the
street from me has a vacancy…
16. At what point in your life do you think you'll be done living with
roommates?
I don’t know that I ever will, if we’re counting significant others
as roommates. I suppose if the whole get married/buy a house/get a
dog/have babies thing doesn’t happen for me in the coming years, I might
feel a little silly having a roommate. Really, I guess the answer to
that is: I’ll burn that bridge when I get to it!
17. Have I had an impact on any of your day-to-day activities? For
example, I now brush my teeth every morning and night because of you,
rather than just one or the other.
You certainly have! I’ve been eating less healthy than I was
pre-Ryan Glanzer, exercising less, and eating out much more often than I
would otherwise. If my ass gets big, you have no one to blame but
yourself!
18. How do you rate a Ryan Glanzer back rub? Is there room for
improvement?
Glanzer demonstrates a solid comprehension of backrub fundamentals
but could certainly benefit from extended spring training and increased
bullpen sessions. Currently he’s projected to be a #2 or #3 starter but
with the right coaching and nutrition plan he could be higher, even in a
deep rotation.
19. What was your first impression of me when we met?
“He’s cute, but good God--why is he so sweaty?”
20. You memorizing "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" for me was very
thoughtful! What song would you be impressed if I memorized?
For the record, I didn’t memorize it intentionally! I just listened
to it a few times. But I’d be amazed if you learned Schubert’s “Ave
Maria.”
21. Pre-Ryan Glanzer, what would you spend your evenings doing after
work?
Nothing terribly exciting! I used to be a lot better about cleaning
my apartment, doing dishes and laundry and the like. More recently I got
a Netflix subscription and started going through the season of “Scrubs”.
22. Tell us about this Twins blog you write called "Yeah, Buddy!"
Curious parties are encouraged to check it out for themselves!
http://yeahbuddy.blogspot.com. It hasn’t been updated much recently as
I’ve been a bit distracted by the new fella I’m dating.
23. Where is your favorite place to eat in the Twin Cities?
I don’t think I could pick just one place! I like to eat at locally
owned restaurants whenever possible, and any place that has a Thai red
curry or chicken Vindaloo that can bring tears to my eyes has my stamp
of approval.
24. How many times have you crossed the US/Canada border?
Easily two dozen times.
25. What is your favorite current TV show?
Due to the ongoing writer’s strike, the only TV show I’ve been
watching lately have been episodes of Scrubs from Netflix!
26. What is your favorite moment/episode from Scrubs?
The last episode of Season 3, which is Carla and Turk’s wedding. JD
broke up Elliot and her boyfriend, then tried to get them back together.
The moment they see each other at the wedding reception there’s this
angelic-sounding “Ahhh!” which you at first think is a sound effect, but
the camera pans over to JD, who is standing a few feet away, singing.
Every time I see that scene I laugh hysterically for several minutes.
Priceless!
27. If you had to pick the bridal party for your future wedding today,
who would the maid of honor and bridesmaids be?
Good question! In an ideal world, I would ask my sister Kate and my
best friend Jaime to split the duties of maid of honor. In reality, I
don’t know if my sister would accept; she’s not really into weddings and
I don’t know if she’d want such a big responsibility. After those two
I’d ask my college friend and sorority sister Meghan, and my high school
friend and blogging cohort Nicky. Of course, if my theoretical groom had
female friends or sisters he wanted included, I’d ask them as well. It
would be only fair—I’d imagine that I would ask him to include my
brother as a groomsman.
28. What is a good name for a pet?
I’ve always wanted to have a dog named Pilot (literature fans will
recognize this as an homage to Jane Eyre) but I have a recent trend of
naming things after professional athletes, baseball players mostly. I
plan on naming my next pet after [Minnesota Wild Defenseman] Petteri
Nummelin.
29. If work was cancelled for you tomorrow and you had the whole day
off, what all would you do?
I would sleep in, make coffee and laze about for most of the day,
reading in bed (I’m currently reading “Baseball Between The Numbers”, a
book on sabremetrics).
30. What are three things that make you laugh?
Ryan Glanzer’s random comments, Judd Apatow films (my love of
Anchorman is well-documented), and acting silly when I think people
might be watching—like singing along and dancing to rap songs while in
my car, in rush-hour traffic
31. What are your thoughts in general on workplace bonuses?
I’m generally a proponent, but recent events have dampened my
enthusiasm for them.
32. You're at the bar when you suddenly realize you've had too much to
drink. What do you do?
Find a seat, find a glass of water, and pray that I don’t throw up
on anyone that I like!
33. If you were to one day move away from Minneapolis, what other cities
seem appealing?
I’m still wildly in love with Toronto. I had a wonderful time living
there and I miss it every day. I don’t know if I could move back,
though, I don’t know if it would ever match up to the fun times I had in
university. I could see myself moving to any of the major cities in the
US—except for Chicago. Bad things happen in Chicago.
34. What is the cutoff date for people wishing you a happy new year?
Mid-January, I guess. If people say it to me I’ll say it back to
them, but I’ll rarely wish someone a happy New Year past New Year’s Day.
35. What is an ideal baseball game for you—high scoring, low scoring,
fast-paced, brawls, etc?
As long as it’s not a blow-out, I’ll enjoy it. I prefer games with
good defensive plays over big offensive games. One of my life’s goals is
to see a bench-clearing brawl in person.
36. Tell us one interesting fact about Sabermetrics we may not have
known.
It’s pretty hard to boil sabremetrics down to a tidbit or two,
because it’s crazy complicated statistics all piled on top of each
other. Basically what I’ve learned is that everything you think you know
about baseball is wrong! But I think one of the most interesting
computation is that of run expectation based on outs and runners on
base. For instance, in 2005, with a runner on 2nd and one out, the team
had a 41% expectation of scoring at least one run.
37. What was it like being a sorority girl?
I had a great time as an Alpha Gam! I don’t think I would have liked
it so much if I had gone to a typical Greek school. My sorority was
about 25 people at its largest while I was there, so I was pretty close
to most of the girls. The Greek community at U of T was pretty
tight-knit. I’d recommend it highly; I met a lot more people and did a
lot more interesting things being in a sorority than I would have had I
not gone Greek.
38. Why is Grain Belt Premium your favorite beer?
Because it’s the beer of exceptional quality, of course!
39. Are there any good stories of you driving the Probe?
Not really! The best part about the Probe is telling people that
it’s what I drive, because they either laugh at the name or the laugh
because it’s not regarded as a very good car. In my experience though,
Richard has been a very good car.
40. Do you like to Facebook stalk people before getting to know them?
I like to Stalkbook whenever possible. I think it’s interesting how
people view and present themselves.
41. What are your thoughts on my facial hair situation? Did you like it
shaved?
Oooh, I don’t know! It was weird to see you without facial hair. I
think I like the aesthetic of the long-stubble look, but it’s not as
much fun to kiss you when your face is all scratchy. I think your facial
hair should get its own section on RyanGlanzer.com; you can post photos
and let your fans vote on new styles.
42. Do you think you'd have a chance on American Idol?
Heck yeah I would! I am incredibly talented.
43. How annoyed will you be if the Boston sports teams continue their
utter dominance?
Very annoyed. I take solace in the fact that the Bruins pretty much
suck, though.
44. Which Twins road series in 2008 would you most want to attend?
The Yankees would be pretty amazing! I’d love to go to the series in
Toronto as well, of course, even though I’ve been to the SkyDome about a
thousand times. The only series I am dead set on going to, however, is
the series in Milwaukee.
45. What food are you best at cooking?
I make a mean chicken/eggplant parmesan. For a Norwegian girl, I
think I’m also pretty good at making Indian food. I think that I’m a
pretty talented cook, and Jason LaPlant will back me up on that
statement!
46. What is the worst grade you ever received in a class? Or, what was
the hardest class you ever took?
Arabic, in 2nd year at U of T was pretty rough; I ended up dropping
the class or I might not have passed. Other than that, I think I got a D
in pre-calculus the last quarter of my senior year of high school.
47. What are your favorite bands?
U2, Ray LaMontagne, the Barenaked Ladies, Simon and Garfunkel, and
Bob Dylan are a handful of my favorites.
48. Do you think you could one day be a fan of country music, if I keep
pounding it into your brain? You have to admit that "What Kinda Gone"
song is pretty catchy.
That song was in my head ALL DAY at work today! I could see myself
enjoying country music, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to really
call myself a “fan” of country music. I think the day I catch you
singing along to a Mariah Carey song, I will call myself a country music
fan.
49. Are you doing this interview while you should be doing something
else?
Currently I’m sitting at your desk, Game 7 of the 1979 World Series
is on the DVD player and you are snoring in bed! I keep kicking you to
try to wake you up, but you only mumble, rub my foot briefly and go back
to snoring.
50. Thank you for joining us today, Lauren! Any closing remarks?
Thanks for interviewing me, Ryan! It was an honor and a pleasure. To
the fans, I hope that this satisfies your curiosity—you all probably
have more information about me than you ever wanted! Thanks for reading.
Go Twins!
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